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Costly Embrace
There was a young woman pastor in one of my pericope
groups that a year ago or so dropped out of parish ministry and decided to go back
in seminary for a doctorate. She had
only been ordained a couple years earlier and served this parish, she
complained about weekly, for even less time.
The parish from what many were told, had been suffering for a long
time. The congregation was embroiled in seemingly
one new conflict to the next as each pastor the parish invited to become their
pastor, in their eyes, would soon give up on them and dump their church on someone
else. The impression one got was that they
felt like a revolving door parish, imprisoned in their own conflicts tied to
building, money and mismanagement… They
didn’t know the first thing about putting their trust in another person to come
and “bring them (any) Good News!” The last news I had heard about them is that
the parish would be closing their doors.
The moral of this story, who gave up their cross
first? All fingers could and most often
do point to the pastor… She wants to go
hide in the seminary library to fill herself with more knowledge. Will it really be useful? Or is she just going home again, to the
sanctuary of the “School of Athens for Jesus” community and all its
surreality? What about the
parishioners? I don’t know them
personally as for I was only on the receiving end of hearing their story
painted by an already spent young pastor.
Could these parishioners be condemning before they even thought to look
at themselves as going against the grain of the cost of discipleship?
Could we hear St. Paul’s conversation to his church
family about Onesimus, here to one degree? “8For this reason, though I am bold enough in Christ to
command you to do your duty, 9yet I would rather appeal to you on the basis of love—and
I, Paul, do this as an old man, and now also as a prisoner of Christ
Jesus. 10I am appealing to you for my child, Onesimus, whose
father I have become during my imprisonment. 11Formerly he
was useless to you, but now he is indeed useful both to you and to me. 12I am sending
him, that is, my own heart, back to you.”
Or are the Words of Jesus more poignant to the cost of discipleship: “27Whoever does
not carry the cross and follow me cannot be my disciple. 28For which of
you, intending to build a tower, does not first sit down and estimate the cost,
to see whether he has enough to complete it? 29Otherwise,
when he has laid a foundation and is not able to finish, all who see it will
begin to ridicule him, 30saying, ‘This fellow began to build and was not able to
finish.’”
Beginning to build and not
being able to finish is the curse of spinning one’s wheels. It is the very human factor of fear. Motivation can only keep up its steam when we
are obedient to facing the Cross. To
facing conflict and other things we don’t want to bear and certainly don’t want
to share. Both St. Paul’s statements of
GRACE and Jesus’ call to us to come and face the music of the cost of
discipleship are the reality of the Christian walk. The surreality of our places of comfort and
idolatry, hiding… are just that, they are not truthful. They cannot save us; they are temporal
promises at best. We need to dig deep
into our heart’s conviction for being a commissioned, called priesthood of all
believers. Diving into these deep
convictions is a radical challenge to us spiritually and transformationally.
St. Augustine connects to
finishing building that foundation: “You wish to be great, begin from the
least. You are thinking to construct some mighty fabric in height; first think
of the foundation of humility. And how great so ever a mass of building one may
wish and design to place above it, the greater the building is to be, the deeper
does he dig his foundation. Jesus Christ, came to you, saw you. Make ready then
to see Him in His height of glory, by whom in His pity you were seen. But
because the top is high, think of the foundation. What foundation? Do you say?
Learn of Him, for He is meek and lowly in heart. Dig this foundation of
lowliness deep in you, and so will you attain to the crowning top of charity by
turning to the Lord.”
Turning to the Lord is
turning to that Cross in GRACE. It is a
costly embrace—our loving and gracious response to a loving and gracious God. For the Lord Christ Jesus took up His cross
and in defeating sin, death and the devil… freed us from slavery. We still chose slavery however, when we turn
to our world, the world of the self and all its idols. We are indentured to our misunderstandings,
seeming failures and surreal expectations.
However, when the Holy Spirit is at work in the heart, expect great
things! These are the Words of Hope, the
Words of the Gospel for us to glean from today’s texts.
I haven’t been back to that
particular pericope group for several months.
I have wondered how the woman I talked about earlier is doing—where she
is and where she’ll be going once she’s done.
I wonder about the dysfunctional parish she left. Where did they go? Are they bearing with one another in peace or
have they completely dissolved their fellowship with one another… Where are they on their walk with God? It’s all a matter of deeply hearing, learning
and living in the Light of GRACE.
How does one deeply hear,
learn and live in the Light of GRACE? There is no formula more than awareness built
upon discipline as the disciple carries on.
No matter where you are on your Christian walk, growing while going is
our cross to bear. R.C. Sproul speaks to
our daily struggle: “Loving a holy God is beyond our moral power. The only kind
of God we can love by our sinful nature is an unholy god, an idol made by our
own hands. Unless we are born of the Spirit of God, unless God sheds His holy
love in our hearts, unless He stoops in His grace to change our hearts, we will
not love Him… To love a holy God requires grace, grace strong enough to pierce
our hardened hearts and awaken our moribund souls.”
Being born of the Spirit of
God is the heart turned, tuned to God and transformed.
Let Us Pray—
Heavenly Father,
Help us to walk the course
you have ordained.
Help us to delight in your
Word, live by your Word
Help us to be confident in
our struggles to be obedient
Help us to stay encouraged
and encourage, motivate others
Most importantly, may we
embrace with an open and turned heart our crosses to bear
May we be salt and light,
beacons of peace, ministers of your Holy Gospel
In Your most Blessed and Holy
Name we pray—
AMEN
Sunday September 8th, 2013; Lectionary 23; 16th Sunday after Pentecost; Proper 18; Year C; SOLA Lectionary
Psalm 1; Deuteronomy 30:15-20; Philemon 1-21; Luke 14:25-35
Nicole Collins
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