Being
an introvert and an Evangelical is kind of an oxymoron, when you come to think
of it… perhaps the Lutheran side of me fits better with the introvert? A LOL
there…. Being empowered by and for God to live into a particular servant-driven
humility is answering that Baptismal calling of taking on the challenge of
being a disciple of Jesus. It is truly living “into” Christ to be “out” with
the Gospel.
I found
a funny article online by Carl King called “Ten myths about introverts,” (http://www.carlkingdom.com/10-myths-about-introverts). I was initially driven to search for this
article in conjunction with recently spiritually and pastorally adjusting slash
preparing myself to host a guest I would be caring for as well as ministering
to. I thought it was funny thinking back
to the early days of my seminary journey and remembering my Myers-Briggs
category being INFJ (Introvert, Feeling and Judging).
When it
comes down to it, it’s all a matter of perspective as well as most importantly
an aspect of being human. Everybody’s
got their limits… though God would like us to be UN-limited! In the beginning, the Old Nature side of
myself was raising those “screaming red flags” saying I NEED ME time! Once I got my spiritual ducks in a row, I
started to grow in seeing the beauty of what called me into ministry in the
first place: Loving neighbor. The Joy of
the Kingdom of God and its abundant ever-flowing fount of Grace is being
empowered through and for Christ to CARE.
What is
the face of care, however? I ask this in the here and now of a world spinning
towards its own man-made destruction… spiritually speaking that is… The Prophet
Isaiah speaks: “Have you not known? (Many a Times we claim to know, don’t we?),
Have you not heard? (Many a Times we claim to listen....), Have you not known
that you are God's own?” Truth be told it’s hard to get into that place, that
zone especially when you feel unsupported and devalued in your efforts by
others. Is this however The Evil One’s efforts working inwardly to bring forth
our negativity, fear and insecurity? To
a degree, Yes, it is!… as well as on many occasions, we, ourselves cut down
others in misunderstanding and through being puffed up in our curved inward
intellectual arrogance about God’s mandate for the Priesthood of All Believers.
Saying
I don't understand goes way deeper especially if you're coming from the inside
venturing towards that metaphoric spiritual door leading out into the world,
beyond the ways and means of the world. The Pharisees couldn’t deal with Jesus’
ministry and motives yet alone at many times His disciples. Peter in today’s Gospel wants Jesus to stay
behind and seems perplexed at His need to go and continue to serve beyond where
they were. The same could be said for
today with the “overly established Church:” Robes, stoles, Hymnals, crosses and
paper are temporal but create something valuable.... to a degree. The true treasure is the heart of the servant
lived with, in, and for the king of Grace, peace and mercy—Jesus. It is by no means "playing church" or
to be merely an intellectual treatise…
There
are times all of us have been here: “If life is just a game, I would rather get
off the ride.” Another favorite of mine is the old Groucho Marx statement: “I
wouldn’t want to belong to a club that would have me as a member…” I think it
is far more...then intellectual forums on "doctrinal legalities..." Where
graceless behavior boasts merely of Satan's work upon the sinner's all too
wavering conscience!
For IF
we fall prey to this…
Peace
can become myth, IF the heart is not willing to bend but remain in bondage to
the self over the Living Word. How can
we know though IF we never try? The sad trail of despair this could cause,
muddies our motivation. Motivation is
the key but it needs that profound sense of trust in the Lord and His good
timing (Living into the Big H of humility) to be and become empowered to take
up that cross, follow and lead as a servant not a scholar! The Old Nature loves
to encourage the idol of our wealth of knowledge to take precedence over truly
and truthfully knowing our spiritual place in the Lord’s family… Are we not
children of God, (to be) children of Grace?
Mercy
can become merciless if all we can create is fear and indifference. How can the
heart comprehend and be shaped by and for God IF we are unwilling, indifferent
to truly loving neighbor? I thought about this, alongside these texts in being
concerned for my guest in how the hospital not only lost her lower set of
dentures and her coat… but said they couldn’t help her. The social workers couldn’t help her, the
township couldn’t help her and so on! It is beyond sad as well as frankly
disturbing… The idol of money took precedence over care and concern for someone’s
needs.
There's
a lot of "IFs" here... When you come to think of it, the human
condition is truly to "blame..." Being conditional is a lot more
attractive than being conditioned. We would rather run the race for that
temporal medal or accolade than for the eternal glory and blessing of God. Such
is the stress and pain of genuine, faithful discipleship! Poor St. Paul, he
suffered such a heavy burden trying to teach the wayward Corinthians to see
things and their faith journey from a Godly perspective. The only way he could reach out to them as
their pastor is sharing introspectively his conversion-fed heart knowledge that
he had to: “22b… become all things to all people that
I might by all means save some. 23I do it all for the sake of the
gospel, so that I may share in its blessings.”
Paul as well earlier in today’s
letter illustrates that blessing comes from living faithfully into our baptism:
“16If I proclaim the gospel, this gives me no ground for boasting,
for an obligation is laid on me, and woe to me if I do not proclaim the gospel!
17For if I do this of my own will, I have a reward; but if not of my
own will, I am entrusted with a commission. 18What then is my
reward? Just this: that in my proclamation I may make the gospel free of
charge, so as not to make full use of my rights in the gospel.” He concludes in
saying: “19For though I am free with respect to all, I have made
myself a slave to all, so that I might win more of them.”
Running
the race with no destination or goal holds little value more than being about
vice. Are you spiritually in vices’ grip catering and in bondage to the world?
Or are you living into that New Creation, New Nature waiting to tear free from
sin, death and the devil? I want to be free… but I am not. This is not just my dilemma but for all of us
somewhere on the path of our journey to serving Christ and neighbor.
What’s
the difference between being introspective and introverted? They both include the prefix of “intro,”
which one could see through a particular lens of faith as the journey is always
going to include some kind of introduction into something new or unexpected….
Being introspective from a humble and teachable place of the heart is not only
truthfully living into accountability but also being and becoming obedient in
order to spiritually mature. Spiritual
maturity is an ongoing process as Pastor Eric would say—reflection, confession,
repentance and renewal. Being introverted is both a social challenge and a particular
perspective in many ways since it could be prayerfully shaped into what makes
one truly KNOW empathy—listening to God & loving neighbor also known as
compassion, love, mercy, kindness, peace...
Recall
Isaiah’s Words again: “Have you not
heard?” Well, have you? There will be a
short quiz at the end of the sermon to see if you were listening~ just
kidding! Seriously though, do you
prayerfully listen to God as well as your neighbor to whom you are commissioned
to minister to, in order to live into being a faithful, faith-filled—spiritually
charged disciple? It’s a tall order, one
that many will not either touch with a ten foot pole or even remotely be
supportive to others who do tap into that fount of power—God’s Amazing Grace
and blessedness.
Why
would there even be people like that? People
who don’t support ministry yet alone the Biblical mandate of the Gospel being a
spiritual treatise over an intellectual one to bear forth the fruit of the
Kingdom of God… This is the war that rages on between catering to the Old
Nature with its idolatry, gracelessness and accolades and the New Nature which is radical ego-crushing, soul shaping and character building prayerful
humility! Who are you going to let be
the Victor? The cross or the grave?!
AMEN
Sunday February 8th,
2015; 5th Sunday after Epiphany; Year B; SOLA Lectionary;
Rev.
Nicole A.M. Collins
Psalm 147:1-11; Isaiah 40:21-31; 1
Corinthians 9:16-27 & Mark 1:29-39
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