'Branching Out;' Sermon for Sunday April 29th by: Rev. Nicole A.M. Collins, OSST

“I am the vine, and you are the branches…” This must have been a wonderful experience for the disciples to hear Jesus talking in such a way as it was not a parable, neither was it an allegory, but it was called a mashal. A mashal is basically an old semetic form of study and example that includes an image and its application to real life. So, Jesus, was giving them a "life lesson." But once again, this is a part of that big giant diamond of Christ, I've been talking about the last few weeks. This is just another side, another facet of this great diamond of the resurrected life, the resurrected life that Jesus continues to try to teach us. 

This fabulous image of thinking of the nation of Israel, the people, as the branches to the vine, that needs to be tended to; is where Jesus begins today with yet another lesson on discipleship. The vines that grew in and throughout Israel, Palestine and nearby countries in real life, need to be severely pruned for them to produce fruit in abundance and to grow healthy. Yet another vision of that Garden that keeps finding its way into Jesus teaching the disciples. We are the wandering children that have long since left the Garden of Eden and have been in the wilderness of the world for quite some time.

The great Shepherd and the gardener of our souls is also the Great Vine. Jesus is the Vine of life that we are to be the branches from and bear wonderful spiritual fruit.  Just what is he meaning here, spiritually for us? We have images of creation. We have the Providence of God—God guiding us. We have the great story and gift of love: being the sacrifice and the Resurrection of Jesus Christ for our sake. Let us begin learning through reflecting upon the past. Let us think about when we left Eden. When we officially became those with the burden of choice: sin or obedience to God? The Israelites before Jesus were on that road quite a long time. They became so lost in wandering in the valleys, and over mountain tops they didn't even realize, that they perhaps became weary and didn’t understand or appreciate YHWH’s divine guidance.

Where is this road leading, God? Why am I still on here? Am I really your child of Grace and promise?  These are all questions that make their way through our covenantal journey. This journey began with YHWH and now with Jesus as members of the Body. We are members of the Body as those branches— branching out and stretching beyond ourselves for the sake of God and others. We have to remember as well, these last few Sundays have been the beginning construction of the church. This is not the brick-and-mortar church, mind you, this is the spiritual church in the heart. The first church God needs to build, the most important one. Jesus has His work cut out for Him to get His “everyday” disciples to understand what He's talking about and needing them to grow in. He needs them to abide in His mission and will for the world. He needs them to not fall weak in their faith, and just go through the motions…, He needs them to respond.

The need to respond, this is our goal and our challenge as disciples of Jesus. We need to go through that spiritual warfare battlefield to listening to God or listening to the world. This is all to, bear the fruit that God needs us to reap. The Holy Spirit has begun construction in the Church of the heart by this time, as well as, in regard to the early church. We are blessed with beautiful passages this morning, not only from the Gospel writer John, but another “day in the life” scene from the Book of Acts. Speaking of a “day in the life,” perhaps you'll want to start playing The Beatles song in your mind, but not going there…  This is more of the day in the life of a moment of true evangelism between Philip the Apostle & an Ethiopian Eunuch. We are literally seeing or experiencing a first century "seeker" from Ethiopia, wanting to be baptized and wanting to learn and grow with God's Word. This was no ordinary man, for he was already "Church shopping," you could say, looking into Judaism but most likely was not allowed to completely participate in the church, because he was a eunuch. Eunuchs if you don't know, were those who participated in bodily mutilation to make a complete vow to be celibate to God. 

In Judaism this was not a cool thing because obviously the person could not be circumcised, Etc. and therefore this person could only be so involved with their practices of faith. This is where the timelessness of the Gospel shines right through, for Philip saw someone who wanted to learn about the Gospel and felt spiritually ready to join with Jesus in being baptized. It was such a very different world of Faith back then. Today this would perhaps, seem so alien to us. We have become consumerist, some have become narcissistic, and some have taking the Gospel on their own terms. It is fair to say, that we are not engaging in the notion of an enchanted world.

The enchanted world was a predominant viewpoint for many centuries. This was where people saw, and were very aware of the life around them, where the spirit perhaps was assumed to be manifested in everything. I don't know how many people have seen the ‘Lord of the Rings’ film series, but if you have, in the second film there is a story of the Enchanted Forest. This enchanted forest was where there was a special kind of water that made the trees alive… and they were alive let me tell you great special effects! We don't hold the same kind of spiritual awareness anymore toward creation. In my opinion, I think we've thrown too much of the baby out with the bathwater. We should strive to be more spiritually aware of the world and the life line of creation, that God has woven throughout it.  This Enchanted view of the world was where the early church was at though. They thought Jesus would return any day, and the notion of the Resurrection was shining most profoundly and bright in their hearts. They were starting to become aware of the nature of Good and Evil, as well as just what the battlefield entailed. One thing that they needed to work on, which we see Jesus even telling His disciples in today's Gospel, is what does it mean to be abiding to someone or something?

Abiding is not only faithfulness, but it goes even deeper than that. Again, Jesus is teaching about love. Especially if He is the vine Himself, the source of life, that we are to learn to strive from in order to experience the fullness of life, the reality of the lifestyle of Grace. Just what is the fullness of life? We could probably clutter our minds with a lot of things that we think make our lives “full…” but in God’s truth, it has nothing to do with money, materialism and "eat drink and be merry for tomorrow you die...." it's much greater than that. We always though, seem to find a way trying to look through the keyhole with both eyes instead of looking Inward, beyond ourselves to questioning—just, what are our true convictions? Are we ready to branch out with the Gospel, as the quote Church? 

The lifeline vine of God's Word is needing to wrap around that first Church the heart. This is not only to keep it alive and well, but to get it truly ticking, operating down the right path. Jesus is still trying to get us to begin to think about reaping the New Nature. The New Nature is what creates a quote, “healthy Church.” This is being committed and covenantal to the cause.  The beautiful intense spirituality in John's letter this morning, is to his community that he is pastoring. In similar ways to Paul, John’s church planting experiences, pastoring had to reach out to those struggling with their faith and the truth of the Gospel they needed to live into.

John's words start becoming this wondering poem, talking about not only the love of God, but God as the source and Spirit of Love. He talks about God as love itself. Love is our ultimate goal to be not only in a gracious and growing relationship with God, but that it is a tool for us to use to live into the lifestyle of Grace.  The Resurrected life through the heart of John, the Gospel writer, and this letter writer, is realizing the love of God through the atoning sacrifice of Jesus. It is seeing the sacrifice as a gift of love, and he is encouraging us to be perfected by God's love.  Just what does he mean perfected by God's love? This is a kind of Love that is nearly impossible for us to replicate ourselves. We have but fleeting moments of it, for it is unconditional love, agape love. Agape is the Greek word for the unconditional love, steadfast love, divine love that Christ gave us and has been trying to teach us through His disciples and all who have come into the priesthood of all believers to be aware of, begin to abide in, live into.

Abiding in that wonderful commandment that Jesus gave to His disciples—“love one another as I have loved you.” This has been in my thoughts and in my heart when I go out and care for people and reach out seeing what efforts I could make to do something for someone. Before I considered church planting and Parish Ministry; I was seriously looking at being a chaplain. I love to go and visit people. That has been truly one of my Joys here, is visiting people. I'm hoping as well then, I'll be able to do house blessings for some of you soon.  This past week I was finding myself living back into that passion of going out and caring for people. These people however were my family. It's always a very hard and draining experience to be a witness to family members who are suffering from illness, and or perhaps beginning to turn that corner towards death. I was not on vacation, I was on a mission. The power of prayer certainly helps a lot, for I felt like I was going back not only into the “Old Nature Wilderness of my life,” but seeing the after effects of Satan's work in the world with unfortunate things that have happened to friends, and in society in general.

My efforts to get back there and be a presence both listening and active for family and friends was operating with God's love flowing through me. God’s love was flowing through me as that vine of life, inspiring me to bear all of my fruit that I could give and helping others, by being there for others. I was saddened to hear that one of the “little old Grandpa's,” I used to care for, for several months or actually almost a year through Visiting Angels, had passed away this past November. His dementia was getting very bad. It was getting to the point, that his wayward son needed to move in with him. Fairly soon after that, they couldn’t even have a female caregiver look after him anymore, because he was becoming violent. And let me tell you, he would do crazy things. I remember the one time I came into check up on him and he was slamming a stick into the floor vent trying to drain the flood waters he said were coating his bedroom floors… Trying to tell him it was just a bad dream got him pretty angry…  I stopped caring for him back in February of last year, but I was sad to see his obituary and I wondered about his family, and I wondered about his cat, and I just really wondered how many people will remember the many things this man did throughout his life before his illness took over.

Healthcare is very difficult these days. It seems our world has profoundly imprisoned it, or “dismantled its ethics” to make it all a matter of money. “Money makes the world go around, the love of money is the roots of a lot of evil…” Caring for one another should have nothing to do with dollars, but welcome to where we're at, as the postmodern world. These are things in the world around us, that as we are those sheep following the Shepherd's voice, as we are those branches growing from the Vine… we need to be aware of what we can and must do. It's beyond a call to action, and I'm certainly not preaching about works righteousness(!) These are things, that the heart urges us, that first church, to not turn an indifferent or greedy or guilty eye away from. 

I was overwhelmed almost to the point of tears to see a few friends who came to help me this past week. They came out to help another person, that they didn't even really know. It was a lot of work. It was grueling and frankly awful. Let's face it, moving is miserable— see this gray hair? It's not from you guys yet (just kidding!) It's probably from last year when I moved here. But through my compassion for helping my friend, I felt the misery of moving with him. I have a bad knee and I have a bad heel. There is very little I could do to help him lift a zillion boxes, putting them into storage units, putting them in his new third floor apartment and what not. I'm not even 50 yet, my body is just not in shape. But at least I was there.  I was driving the cars, and the UHaul trucks, and my friends were driving their SUVs and vans… We were watching things and those who were in better shape than me, were helping to move things. It was a burden, but it's that love that Jesus talks about that makes it all worthwhile— where the fullness of life is even seen through the struggle.

In a few weeks here, or less than that I should say, pretty soon, we are going to all have to pitch in and help move things. But that's going to really be a joy! It's not just, as I've been saying, because it's a new steeple, bricks and mortar but hopefully you'll see this is the glory of God in our spirit to revive, to be replanted. We could say honestly, that we have Resurrected as a family in Christ. We have been those faithful branches clinging to the vine of life, that kept us searching, and kept us building towards this moment. Don't lose that Spirit now, battle the world faithfully in knowing that God is providing for us and guiding us. Every step of the way, God has been with us, is with us, on the journey— this is Faith.

Branching out of yourself, living into those true convictions, is the cost of discipleship. Truly being those Easter people is making the right decision, which is abiding in Christ, and literally does make all the difference in the world! When we go out to visit or care for others, there is probably something very personal that drives us there initially, but we need to keep encouraged that God is helping us to work through being a gift of love, perfecting ourselves in Christ, for the sake of neighbor.  When we leave these doors today, think about walking through another door to reach out to someone who may really need you to be there for them. Be a gift of love to those who may really need you, and you don't even realize. God is love, putting on, living into this love, abiding in it is what gives us strength to realize the truth of life and live most gloriously “full” in this life.

Let us pray

Gracious and Loving Lord Jesus,

We thank you for the wonderful gift of Agape Love, Divine love

You have shared through Your cross and Resurrection

Teach us to abide in this love by bearing gifts of kindness, compassion, selflessness, mercy and Grace to others.

It is through Your perfecting love, that we truly begin to realize the Spirit

Of what makes us children of Grace and of Your promise.

May we always be enlightened by Your will and purposes for us.

In Your most holy and precious Name, we lift this prayer to You.

April 29^th, 2018; Fifth Sunday of Easter; Year B; SOLA Lectionary

Sermon by: Reverend Nicole A.M. Collins

Psalm 150; Acts 8:26-40; 1 John 4:1-21 & John 15: 1-8

 The link below is to this sermon's delivery at First Congregational Church at 9:30am

 https://youtu.be/x7JVpuofVMc

Under Construction; Sermon for April 22nd, 2018 by: Rev. Nicole A.M. Collins, OSST

It's not too often that we use outside sheet music, but for this particular Sunday, the wording of this particular song is very important. We learned as the first Creed of the early church, Jesus is Lord. The Lord Jesus is truly Our Shepherd, our great guide. He is the Cornerstone that we continue to reject, and this is another side of the diamond of Christ who is to be at the center of our lives and our very hearts.

Those very three words— Jesus is Lord, met with turmoil because of the politics of the time. Israel was definitely an occupied land. Rome believed themselves to be in the hierarchy of Gods. The emperor was considered to be God. That is why he was on the Romans’ coins that is why, as such address he would be referred to in a “divine way.” For an occupied country to DARE Proclaim Jesus is Lord… St Paul did in several letters as well as the apostles activity in and throughout the Book of Acts got them into some deep persecution.

Our next mini-series installment, courtroom-drama scene today in the Book of Acts, is that Peter and John were arrested they were arrested because they started preaching that Jesus was resurrected from the dead. The Sadducees were more or less the politicians of the Jewish Church. They wanted to keep the peace, no matter what the cost, even if it went against the truth and became an act of indifference and grave sin itself. Their willful act, alongside the Pharisees, made them to be the “wolves and the false Shepherds,” that Jesus talks about in his wonderful parable or metaphor, from the Gospel of John.

Just before this little tiny snippet from the Gospel, is Jesus using yet another story in saying how he is the Gate keeper. Throughout the Gospel of John, we have many moments of Jesus trying to indirectly pry at the conscience of the scribes and Pharisees with not too much success. Perhaps the greatest story ever of a changing heart, which is not talked about today, is with the Pharisee Nicodemus. There was a man who finally had his heart opened and laid aside, laid down his fear, even at the risk of being persecuted himself to support, Jesus. He was still kind of a chicken heart about it and kept it as a “quiet support…” but at least, in some senses, he was beginning to see the light.

In another sense, you could say that he was a disciple under construction. It is fair to say however, that we are all works under construction, works-in-progress. Though the ways of the world, which John and his letter is cautioning against today, would like us to put the ego and the self, first, above everything, and most certainly above God's will. Love is something that tears down all barriers and becomes those indestructible bricks towards building the kingdom of God. Those bricks of love began through realizing God's grace and realizing living into the resurrected life.

Some Reformed traditions have tried to understand God's Grace in separate little categories. As far as I'm concerned Grace is Grace. It is that extra bold Hollywood size signed reality of the heart inscribed upon us by God's Word. The one Reformed category of Grace, that a lot of these texts had me thinking about today, is what some call “prevenient Grace.” This is more or less, a perspective that God's divine Grace precedes and leads us to make the right decisions.  As I've said I believe grace alone and God's word alone, are what help us to find our feet on God's true path for us.

Finding the true path for us being thoughtful sheep to our great Shepherd is achieved through love. Love is the end of the law. Love is the greatest element of the Gospel of Grace, Jesus reveals to us. It is a kind of power that is not of this world— it is of the kingdom of God, we have yet to understand. The words of both Jesus and the apostles today, are hoping for us to begin construction. Even before the famous Sunday of Pentecost to come, the beginning of the church, is needing to start laying down its bricks and mortar. And this is not the bricks-and-mortar that we are thinking of, but they are spiritual bricks of building the church within our hearts for the Holy Spirit to work within.

This construction however needs to tear down the barriers of greed and indifference, that continually re-form new obstacles in our lives to be swayed by false Shepherds and wolves. Just the other day or so, I have been praying for some friends to find where God is leading them to call their new home Church. Yes, I did try Guerilla evangelism and say please come to my church, you'll have fun! :-)  All humor aside, I think it is a very sad and difficult thing for the modern Christian so entrenched by the secular world etcetera, to have to be involved in the task of "church shopping." From what I was hearing from their hearts, they seem to be lost in the sea of choices.  Sometimes what may seem to be the answer, or their final place turns out to be a disappointment on one level or another. It's sad to be at that place.

As some of you know I do visit other churches on Saturdays to see what they're doing and network with other pastors and colleagues. There are things to be learned with what has become now the “institutionalized church.” What we have been seeing these past few Sundays into the Easter season, is not only the pure beginnings of the true ideal Church, but we are seeing the beginnings of the truth and cost of what discipleship truly is. Here's the cold stone reality of where we are now—

the church has been broken for quite some time. In a dark way, you can say, it is a structure that has lots of duct tape around it, little bits of plaster of Paris smattered in holes, lots of glue and way too many nails to cover up what we've not been able to be faithfully accountable in fixing, for the sake of the Gospel.

This “Shack or deteriorating building,” could also be spiritual though as well. We hear it from yet another of Peter’s very bold speeches, point blank to the Sadducees scribes and Pharisees in the temple. He's on trial folks. Both are, he and John are in a heap load of trouble! Outside of them daring to preach Jesus is Lord, the Messiah, and that He resurrected from the dead, they are going about and even healing people in the Name of Jesus, how dare they! Peter called them to the carpet for it though, he says: “… this Jesus is the stone that you rejected! You so-called builders… and now He has become the Cornerstone. Jesus is the Cornerstone of Grace and The Sovereign of Love in the world. Abiding in God's Grace is becoming those builders. Becoming truthful builders of love in the world, for a purpose truly beyond the self, and in light of others.

Becoming those Builders of love, truth and action, beyond the self, is living the cross-shaped life of a disciple. What does that mean? God is always challenging us to stretch beyond our worldly capacity. The world caters to our greed, to be willful and the world caters to the easy choice of becoming indifferent. Indifference, I think is really a truly horrible sin or structural sin, as I have mentioned. The self is so concerned with its wants, needs and agendas… it would never consider laying down its life for someone else, yet alone for a greater purpose. There's all kinds of ways that we could be those wandering sheep though, and follow the wrong voices.

It's incredible and amazing how much of a traveling wasteland or junkyard, the internet can be with different articles on things, commentaries and what not. Sometimes you feel like you're looking at a big barge of items that shouldn't be recycled or even thought about. Some things are rather humorous and ridiculous, and come out of our fears and ignorance. For instance, the one funny thing I saw this week was that the apocalypse is supposed to happen tomorrow right before I take off for Chicago to help some friends and visit my family. I hope you're all prepared~ all you “beam me up Jesus people” out there LOL. This probably makes only the 15th announcement for this year of some kind of Apocalypse date… I guess some people just have too much time on their hands. This happens when you're hearing what you want to hear from God's Word as well as what's going on in the world. And it's easy to get those channels mixed up.

Another item I saw, that seems like a good Sci-Fi story, that maybe the X-Files or Star Trek, or something like that should have taken on and done… though there are shows out there now, that are talking about time travel. This was a very long article that had a serious tone to it from a man who claims he's traveled to the year 2700 something, and then to another year in 6700 something... He basically highlights all our great fears. We are going to annihilate each other with nuclear war. We are going to become socialists under martial law and that there will be no real sense of peace. What a horrible vision! Maybe he just time traveled to hell.. we hope anyway. 

This one show that they have on now called ‘Timeless,’ toys with the notion-- that we can change the outlook of the future. It's fascinating. It's fascinating as a science fiction thing of course, as well as it is fascinating to look at, as a Christian. If we do not have enough faith in God, yet alone ourselves… we fall prey to seeing or believing in these things these writings from people or observations, that we are doomed, and we have no hope. The reality and power of the Gospel preaches and teaches us otherwise. If we tap into and reap that New Nature, that has been planted by the Grace of Christ and showered upon with his steadfast Sovereign Love, we can be a people to change the tide of things. We may be only a people that change our little realm of the eastside of Las Vegas or we could continue to strive for an even greater goal, for an even greater challenge to help others to change the world to realize the kingdom of God, not in the distant future but as a reality— Here and Now.

Realizing the sovereignty of Christ's reign from the Resurrection onward, is a great task for us. We are those works-in-progress though. We are in training to be builders ourselves. When we are meeting in our team meetings or on council, we are here helping to build those spiritual bricks. I know as well, even with my hopping into your story somewhere around chapter 52 last year, that you have been a people seeking to have a real sense of home again with the actual bricks and mortar. Let me be the first to say, that your faith has made fantastic efforts. Every time I pass by our new church location, I start to see in my mind's eye all the Ministries that we can develop. I start to see all the children and families coming through our doors, joining people together in love through weddings, doing Bible studies, singing in choirs again... I could sit in my car for more than a half-hour and just keep imagining and wondering all the things we can build together, fairly soon.

It's taken a lot of faith to come to this point. I love the notion that you, as well, will be incorporating items from the old church building. Just like what they say for weddings, something old, something new, something borrowed and something true. We are marrying ourselves to the new leg of the journey of the Gospel, as the bride of Christ, His church. For just as John says in his first letter this morning: “God is greater than our hearts and He knows everything. We have boldness before God because we obey His Commandments and do His will. We love one another just as He commanded, and we abide by His spirit that leads us, as the great Shepherd.”

The Prelude and postlude this morning is probably one of my most favorite songs about God's grace. Yes, just as much or even more than Amazing Grace. It is ‘All Good Gifts,’ from the movie Godspell. I love that the singer is beyond grateful. I love that he is singing his praises to God, and realizing the true reality of of God's Grace and Love in his life, and in all of creation. When that man was talking about going into the year 6700 and saying that Florida would be gone, and all these other places have disappeared, and that the Earth was ruined… it just was such a horrible contrast to what we have around us now. We probably take for granted having nearly every day with blue skies here, and the beautiful way the mountains edge in our city here. We take for granted so much of the world that is around us, because it's just there.

We can look at the world as, “we're just here,” and as I had said last week, just think we're reading 2000 year old beautiful poetry… or we can wake up to that metanoia, that change of heart and mind, to see God's truth shining straight through all of the false Shepherds and wolves and obstacles, we have in the world to turn us away from God.  In my kitchen which took some time to spiritually decide to do, I had taken out pictures from a picture frame that was my from my graduation from the school of the Art Institute. the tape was becoming yellowed and the pictures were coming loose, and I certainly don't look like I did when I was 22, and it just felt like I needed to put something there that was a part of my New world. My best friend Jurek, gave me a poster of the great Shepherd. Of all strangeness, it fits the frame perfectly and it is one of the early Byzantine icon paintings of the Great Shepherd... I even though, had to reset the picture wire in the back to have it hang vertically then from what it has been hanging as for several years now. So, it just sounds like it's just a “day in the life” type moment... but I think it was a moment of God’s divine revelation for moving forward and moving onto that New-Natured path. 

Even becoming aware of the smallest moments in your everyday world are part of God leading us through His Love and Grace, down a great and glorious path towards the Kingdom of God. Cross bearing activity is doing the “Do’s” of the Gospel. That is living into a cross shaped life as a disciple of Jesus. Living into the world is easy, but it's rewards are just a temporal delusion to true happiness and where God really needs us to be.  Life is our chance of learning how to love, and life without love is death. The world without the Gospel is a world full of wolves.

You've got to be a person to take risks. Of all people, who would first seem like a big doofus and a chicken heart, Peter steps up to the plate and becomes this fearless leader for the early church through the book of Acts. There's many delightful stories and realities in this wonderful writing, from the Gospel writer Luke. Probably one of my favorites is the kosher sheet dream that Peter has, where this sheet with all unclean animals floats down and he has to question and ask God what's this all about? Just another day in the life moment, for one of the avid disciples of Jesus.  

Hearing that again-- you've got to be a person to take risks. You've got to be able to “walk that talk.” You need to love, not in word or speech, but in truth and action. Church planting and even re-planting is risky business. The world would love to make us pessimists about it.  You've got to be a stronger person. How you get there is by developing that relationship with the great Shepherd, Jesus. Remember, He is that diamond in the center of your lives, center of your heart. His light is shining through those many facets of things He needs you to learn and grow from. Are you listening, or are you rejecting His Cornerstone in the Church of your heart?

We can see time and space as just cause and effect, and just something that we sit back and be spectators to, or we can shape this very time and space for the will of God, through the love of God, and for the love of God and neighbor. It's all in your hands. Can you sacrifice something from yourself for a greater cause for a Greater Joy that would white out anything you've ever experienced before? This is believing the kingdom of God as here and now. It is being aware of God's Sovereign Grace and His Sovereign Love, even to his wayward children of Grace and promise. Remember we are a child of promise— let's keep it.

Let us pray

Loving and Gracious Lord Jesus,

May we truly realize how Great and Gracious You are as our Shepherd in this world.

Help us to grow beyond ourselves, to always know that we are works in progress, under construction.

Help us to be builders of Love on the foundation of Your amazing Grace.

Help us to realize all good gifts around us, help us be good gifts of love, grace, peace and mercy to our neighbor.

Help us to tear down indifference, greed and hate to reap and build that New Nature world.

Amen

April 22nd, 2018; Fourth Sunday of Easter; Year B; SOLA Lectionary

Sermon by: Reverend Nicole A.M. Collins, OSST

Psalm 23; Acts 4:1-12; 1 John 3:16-24; John 10:11-18

 

The link below is to this sermon's delivery at First Congregational Church at 9:30am
https://youtu.be/5S4csk1wMiE